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Saturday, November 28, 2009

Shaniya Nicole Davis

I am tired, weary, heartsick of reading the stories of parents who become monsters. Shaniya Nicole Davis was sold to a man who, through his forcible violation of her five year old body, choked the life out of her. Her mother, who carried her for nine months, who had other children, sold her precious daughter, who loved earning high marks in school, for drugs.

The time has long since come for all of those involved in birth to take a stand. We have all seen mothers and fathers too incompetent, too unaware, too monstrous to be caregivers. Their black hearts are full of poison and their children are their prey.

No more.

It is well-documented somewhere that there were problems in the family, problems with drugs, problems with maturity, etc. There were relatives who loved and cared for little Shaniya, relatives who returned her to her mother, who consigned her to a horrible, cruel, twisted death.

Shaniya Nicole Davis.

This is the focus. Her life was taken by the one who gave her life, and the one who gave her life is no longer human, she is strung out on drugs and not in her right mind. Once a human has committed such a monstrous act, there is no human redemption.

If there were true justice, the woman who procured the death of Shaniya Nicole Davis would be walled up in the cask of amontillado.

Let God forgive her. I spit upon her who deliberately deprived her own daughter of both innocence and life and my heart is cold toward her.

I only have tears for the prey, Shaniya Nicole Davis. Poor angel, rest now, far from the ravaging hands and clawing horror of your final hours...

Monday, November 23, 2009

Thanksgiving is no reason to go to pieces...

Many clients are calling, emailing and coming by to ask for hints and tips for surviving this holiday season. Frazzled, jangled, at loose ends and ready to throw in the towel, they are trying to balance the perfect meal with the perfect house with the perfect baby with the perfect husband.

Some have physically recoiled when I simply, cheerfully, say to them: "Sit down, have a hot cuppa, and by the way, not happening, lovey. "

One client burst into tears, convinced that she was a wretched failure.

This set me to write upon this subject. The time has come, as my grandmother says, for some good, solid facts and hard home truths.

First, let us be frank. If you are not an octopus, you will not wake up and just magically have a sitcom-worthy house with all of the Norman Rockwell trimmings.

Second, no one does it by themselves, with no help, with no planning and with a squalling newborn.

Third, if help is offered, DO take it, with as many thanks as possible.

Fourth, a small, well-cooked dinner is better than a disasterous six-course meal.

Fifth, if you have never prepared Thanksgiving before, for heaven's sakes, get help.

Sixth, restaurants are accepting your reservations for Thanksgiving dinner.

Seventh...calm yourself, dry your eyes, and be thankful for what you do have.

Eighth...have a wonderful, calm, peaceful, safe Thanksgiving!

Friday, November 20, 2009

How to handle Thanksgiving's Temptations

For many, Thanksgiving is a time of good food, good drink, good times with family and friends. It is also a time when overindulgence and relaxed rules on dieting overcome the usual common good sense and moderation. This is why it is important to have both an entrance and an exit strategy for the upcoming holiday season.

One strategy that I prescribe for my clients to combat the holiday stresses and rich food is PREVIEW. With this plan in mind, the holidays become more manageable and more enjoyable.

P is for pacing. This means think about what is important and necessary for you to do this season; many invitations can be tempting, but leave you drained. Balance what you have to do with what you need to do.

R is for resting. Naps are not just for little kids;adults often suffer from sleep deprivation and need to compensate. This in practice is to allow yourself a period of 15-45 minutes to relax, put your feet up, place a cool compress on your head and collect yourself before racing off to the next holiday fete-or struggling in the kitchen with a holiday meal.

E is for energy. Take your vitamins, do your yoga-whatever it takes to naturally keep your energy levels optimal and even. Do not skip snacks nor overrely on caffeine.

V is for vitality through vegetables. Many are robbed of it this holiday season due to lack of planning and overcommitting. Save your vital energy for what is vitally important: vegetables, vegetables, vegetables. At the least, pack in a case of V8 and drink it all through the day.

I is for integrity. Keep your schedule intact. Keeping to a schedule, more or less, will help keep your equalibrium intact. One or two late nights are okay-so long as you maintain rest periods for yourself.

E is for exercise. Do not gleefully abandon exercise; in fact, keeping to an exercise routine will help to ground you and keep you from overindulgence.

W is for water. Water is vital to maintaining health, keeping digestion going strong, and eliminating waste from the body.

Give PREVIEW a try and you will have a holiday to remember!

Have a wonderful, happy and safe Thanksgiving! Thank you to all my faithful readers and I thank you for supporting me!